Don’t Let Anything Dull Your Sparkle: How to Break Free of Negativity and Drama by Doreen Virtue

This book wasn’t for me.

Don’t get me wrong, I love sparkling.

But, what dulls my sparkle is considering all of the ways in which the world raises my histamine levels, which seems to be Doreen Virtue’s thesis for this book: “…the next day as I was walking along Post Street in Union Square, I heard the inner message that is the basis of this book. … “The reason why you and so many people are experiencing life drama is because you’re addicted to histamine.” loc 81, ebook.

She goes on to list various ways that one may lower this including: major dietary changes, laundry detergent, cleaning supplies, certain types of exercise, therapy, dry cleaning chemicals, what types of plastic bottles to drink from, what types of television programs to expose yourself to, what types of make up to wear and much, much more.

I hope that the readers who are looking for this type of information find Don’t Let Anything Dull Your Sparkle because it is one of the most complete types of books of this kind that I’ve ever read.

The thing is, I could make myself crazy if I tried to control all of that stuff.

I’ve discovered, through my own life, that if I do the inner work of feeling better then external circumstances sort of fall into place on their own without me dancing around trying to make it so.

Don’t get me wrong- I am all for self care. Regular massages, aromatherapy, professional therapy, organic foods, support groups, whatever you need to make yourself feel better, do it.

I just don’t need to adjust those things to sparkle. I feel innately sparkly. I am a veritable disco ball of sparkles.

Beyond the histamine issue, it is clear that Dr. Doreen Virtue had another career in psychotherapy. If you’ve experienced drama of any kind, trouble finding that special someone or encountered difficult personalities, she will help you get past that in this book.

There again, my significant other and friends are all quite normal and low drama- sparkling, if you will.

But, if you’ve had relationship troubles, this could be the book that you’re looking for. So, seriously, don’t let me deter you if you feel you need to read it.

“Remember, it’s not about how many friends you have; it’s the quality of the friendships that matter. Even one good friendship, built upon mutual respect and other healthy qualities, will help you sparkle throughout the day.” loc 2034, ebook.

Meditation and yoga, two of my favorite things, are highlighted in this book as ways to improve your life. I couldn’t agree more!

In this passage, Doreen is talking about dealing with potential drama in your family or with in-laws: “…any way you slice it, the situation will bring up stress hormones in your brain and body, and part of being responsible is taking care of yourself. So, go do yoga as soon as you can. Play gentle music, meditate, eat a low-histamine diet, and avoid chemicals.” loc 1961, ebook.

The trouble is: brownies are not low-histamine. That’s a deal breaker for me.

I recommend this book if you’re sick and fed up with the way life is going and you want to try something drastic to turn it all around. Otherwise, I’d have to suggest borrowing this one from the library.

I’ve heard that high library usage lowers histamine levels and makes you sparkle too. Kidding.

Thank you to NetGalley and Hay House publishing for a free digital copy of this book. And, thank you for reading!

On the Move: A Life (Oliver Sacks’ memoirs #2) by Oliver Sacks

I knew nothing about Dr. Oliver Sacks before I read this book other than the fact that he was a prolific writer. Now I know much, much more.

I loved that Dr. Sacks didn’t hesitate to jump into the nitty gritty details of his life. One line that really stuck out to me: “It was just as well that I had no foreknowledge of the future for after that sweet birthday fling I was to have no sex for the next thirty-five years.” pg 203 Boom. It’s the last line of a chapter section, he neither explains it nor dwells on it. How extraordinary.

I also liked reading about the dramatic parts of his life like his early drug addiction, love of motorcycling, wild nights at the Y, and stint with the American truckers. I found myself dragging through his reminiscing about research or intellectual friends. I think the problem is that I don’t find the inner workings of the mind nearly as fascinating as he did.

Dr. Sacks lists his research pursuits in page after page of case studies, reading, and memories and it wasn’t very fun to slog through. I would probably enjoy the books that he wrote during these times more than this one that was about the writing of them. Another problem, sometimes during the narration, he moves backwards and forwards in time without noting that he is doing so other than writing the date. That was frustrating for me.

Despite some slow portions, Dr. Sacks does have some very beautiful writing in On the Move. Take this passage, where he’s thinking about why he lived so many years of his life on the East coast of the US when he really loved the West coast: “I suspect my nostalgia may be not only for the place itself but for youth, and a very different time, and being in love, and being able to say, “The future is before me.” pg 131

He also struck a chord with me in this line where he’s talking about his love of journaling: “My journals are not written for others, nor do I usually look at them myself, but they are a special, indispensable form of talking to myself.” pg 383 I feel that way too. I pour myself out on written pages in ways that I feel unable to do in the rest of my life through conversations or whatever else.

Dr. Sacks was extraordinarily bright, interested in life and all of its internal mechanisms. At least, after reading this memoir, one can say that he lived fully and well.

I received a free copy of this book through the Goodreads First Reads program. Thanks for reading!

Orlean Puckett: The Life of a Mountain Midwife by Karen Cecil Smith

The Life of a Mountain Midwife is an interesting, but sometimes meandering, biography about a midwife named Orlean Puckett who lived and worked in rural Appalachia.

This reminded me of Laura Ingalls Wilder’s Little House on the Prairie books in that Karen Cecil Smith takes great care to detail the day-to-day chores, food, clothing, and lives of the people of Appalachian Mountains in the 1800’s to 1900’s. I loved those intimate details, many of which are completely gone from the modern lifestyle like chopping wood, lighting the stove, and cleaning laundry by hand.

Also, I am a big fan of BBC television show, Call the Midwives so the chapter detailing Puckett’s extraordinary midwifery skills was fascinating to me. Take this gem: “Aunt Orlean continued to ask, ‘Don’t you think it’s about time to feather her?’ Dr. Cundiff finally said, ‘Okay,’ at which point Aunt Orlean produced from her bag a goose feather. She stuck it into the fire and then placed the smoking feather beneath the mother’s nose. The mother started coughing and sneezing and the baby was born immediately.” pg 101 Can you believe that!

Astoundingly, Orlean Puckett delivered over 1000 babies with almost zero training and never lost a mother or child.

Karen Cecil Smith utilizes actual interview tidbits from many of the people who knew Orlean Puckett for this book and that was also enjoyable. She maintained their improper grammar and local accent which lent real flavor to the narrative. For example, many of the children that Orlean helped deliver said that she “borned” them. Here’s a memory from a relative: “Now I was gonna stay up there one night with Granny (Orlean) and she was gonna learn me how to bake wheat bread the next mornin’ and Uncle Stewart he had to go to work and they waked me up and wanted to know if I wanted to put on bread.” pg 57

My only complaint about this book is that it wanders in places and the reader is led into extended stories about ancillary people to Orlean’s life when, this reader at least, just wanted to know more about the Orlean herself.

If you are mainly interested in local history, this book is like a casual conversation with an elderly friend. I’d even go so far as to compare it to an unedited Story Corp interview. It can be charming but also frustrating when the story goes on and on but doesn’t seem to go anywhere.

If you enjoyed this book, I’d suggest any of the Laura Ingalls Wilder series. They have the same sort of detail oriented focus but with more of a story line.

I received a free copy of this book through Goodreads First Reads program. Thank you for reading!

Aerie (Magonia #2) by Maria Dahvana Headley

Warning: minor (and major if you haven’t read the first book) spoilers, proceed with caution.

Aerie is a very strange and complex, young adult fantasy. Allow me to explain.

In the first book, we met Aza, a girl who was drowning on Earth because, though she doesn’t know it, she’s actually from a kingdom in the clouds. She’s in love with Jason, a genius boy with obsessive thoughts like repeating the numbers of pi in his head over and over again.

Many adventures happened in the first book, but essentially we learned that in Aza’s home, the Magonians use their voices in magical ways. Through changing vibrations, Magonians can make elements appear and change, control the weather and animals, manipulate the molecules of reality itself.

Like most young adult stories, Aza is special, a savior with godly abilities that she didn’t know she had until she was tested. She’s supposed to bring balance back to Magonia because Aza’s mother is crazy and wants to kill everyone on the ground- Jason included.

One of the things that happens at the end of the first book is that Aza’s mother is imprisoned. (Lots of other stuff happens too.)

This book picks up where the last one left off. Jason and Aza are deepening their relationship though Aza looks like a completely new girl because she trashed her “skin,” essentially a suit that allows her to look and breathe like a human, and had to acquire a new one.

Did I mention that Magonians have naturally blue skin with orange/red eyes and white tattoos that change depending on their emotional state? Yeah, that’s a thing.

Aza’s mother, Zal, breaks out of prison and someone has to stop her before she destroys the world. There are rumors of “The Flock,” a weapon of some sort that can stop Zal, but no one knows where or what it is.

And that, I think, is where this story really begins.

Headley’s world building is epic. Magonia itself is a treasure and the other supernatural creatures that the author introduces are tantalizing in their possibility.

However, I didn’t care much for the characterizations or the obvious plot twists.

The grand showdown itself was a huge disappointment like expecting a brightly colored balloon on your birthday only to have it pop in your hands when you receive it. Headley gathered all of these potentially awesome characters together but only the actions of three mattered.

I wanted ships firing at each other, creatures made of flame, earth, water, feathers… slamming into each other in waves, with the earth itself rising in fountains in an effort to touch the sky.

But that didn’t happen.

Aza’s special, I get it.

Aza can sing a song that only she can sing, I get that too.

She FEELS things deeply then SINGS them deeply. Blah.

I just never connected with Aza the way Maria Headley wanted me to. Headley built a lovely world that was so much more than just three characters.

Perhaps I’m being unfair- did anyone who read this book feel differently? I would love to hear from you.

Recommended for readers who are willing to overlook a weak story for some fantastical and wildly imaginative elements.

You don’t have to read the first book to appreciate this one, but I think you’d want to in order to absorb the outlandish world that is Magonia. Some similar reads: The Breedling and the City in the Garden, Archivist Wasp, or Under the Empyrean Sky.

Thanks for reading!

Rasputin’s Supernatural Dating Service by David D. Hammons

Imagine for a moment that supernatural creatures are real. All of those bloodsucking vampires, toothy werewolves, wandering sasquatch, elves, ghosts, and witches from the stories, they actually exist. Why would all of these beings have notoriously difficult relationships with humans from hauntings to kidnappings to feasts made of human flesh? Rasputin has a theory. He thinks that they’re looking for love in all the wrong places. And the answer to the world’s problems lies through the doors of Rasputin’s Supernatural Dating Service.

Rasputin is THE Rasputin, a seemingly immortal mystic from tsarist Russia who has a way with the ladies, the supernatural, and, sometimes, the men too if he’s in the right mood. This ancient horn dog steers the agency from the golden hot tub in his office and sends his agents throughout the country, certifying legitimate supernatural creatures for dating service access. Eli Kowalski, the narrator, is one of those agents. His troubles begin when a vampires gives him an ancient artifact of unimaginable power and a sinister supernatural creature begins hunting Eli in order to take this power for himself.

Is this story ridiculous? Yes, it is. Did I love it? Surprisingly, yes, I did. David Hammons reminds me of a young Christopher Moore, a silly storyteller with heart. If you can see the humor in an elderly mystic driving a phallic shaped hot rod while demanding that his dating service underlings call him “the Love Machine” then you may enjoy this story too.

Just to give you a taste, here is Eli reading the privacy policy of the Supernatural Dating Service: “Your information will not be shared with any non-Certified member, nor will your home address, dwelling, lair, ethereal plane, or other physical, metaphysical, neo-physical, and existential contact details be divulged to any group outside the RSDS and appropriate government agencies. … Your privacy is important to us, as is your ability to make sweet love to whatever creature you desire.” Lawyers required us to say most of that. Rasputin required us to say the last part.” loc 106, ebook.

Recommended for readers who enjoyed Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ’s Childhood Pal or almost anything by Tom Holt.

Thank you to NetGalley and Curiosity Quills Press for a free advance reader’s copy of this book. And thank you for reading!

Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury

fahrenheit451 In a not too distant future, owning books is against the law. Firemen burn property instead of protect it and everyone is dialed in to their televisions, subsisting on a steady stream of sensational media stories and vapid entertainment to numb their quickly congealing brains. The nation is always at war, but you would never guess it from the populace’s empty conversations and emptier dreams. Guy Montag longs for something different, but what exactly, he can’t even say, until he meets a girl who wanders outside for fun and sees faces in the moon. He becomes convinced that what society has labeled as wrong and anti-social is more real than anything he’s experienced in a long time. However, these are dangerous thoughts. And, being a fireman, Guy knows, more than anyone, the price that is demanded of people who dare to think, read, and entertain original thoughts.

Fahrenheit 451 was shocking to me. Ray Bradbury predicted internet/social media addiction long before such things existed. He also called society’s horrifically shortened attention spans. Where once, we would have read through a novel or a long article, now we spend less than thirty seconds absorbing information before scrolling onwards to the next thing, then the next, and the next. (Goodreads friends excepted from the majority, of course.)

I listened to the audiobook version where Tim Robbins performed the narration. It was brilliant. He is a natural fit for this material and I highly recommend it.

The only annoying thing about listening to the audiobook is Bradbury’s use of repetition to build the tension and pound his ideas home. You’ll particularly notice it when the war planes fly overhead or when Guy gets into a big fight with his wife and she won’t turn off the television. It’s headache inducing but Bradbury certainly knows how to make a point.

This is one of those classics that I never got the chance to read in school, but I wish I had. I would have enjoyed this much more than Hard Times, which I managed to yawn my way through. Recommended for those who are disturbed by the shallowness of modern life and long for real connections with the people and world around them. The lessons that Bradbury teaches are still very applicable today and, as I said, shocking in their implications.

Thanks for reading.

Boy Meets Depression: Or Life Sucks and Then You Live by Kevin Breel

Boy Meets Depression is a raw memoir written by someone who lived through the depths of mental illness but, fortunately for the world, lived to tell about it.

Between relating events from his past, the author pokes around in the dark corners of his mind and it can be difficult to read because of his brutal self consciousness. Kevin Breel’s flowing, almost stream of consciousness, writing style probably isn’t for everyone, but I generally liked it because it allowed me to literally step inside his brain while I was reading his book.

Having dealt with a bout of crippling depression when I was at the age Breel describes here, I empathized deeply but also was forced to look through the mirror of my own recollections at moments that I perhaps didn’t want to remember.

But, that was ok. Breel’s point is that these life stories and experiences do not define us, it’s what we do with our lives that does.

A few highlights for me:

“You make a better life through example, not opinion. You can’t just think things. You gotta live them out.” pg 167 He found a counselor he liked and this was in one of their conversations.

“The thing about trying to figure out who you are is that it’s big waste of time. You never end up finding yourself, only being a part of the journey which is creating you.” pg 172 A conversation with his mother in which he realizes that he can go to therapy until he croaks but that the point of life is to live it.

“I’m not much a fan of stars, but I am a fan of the idea that sometimes life has to go pitch black before you can really appreciate the light.” pg 174 In this passage, Kevin was talking about the extreme darkness in the Yukon and how it allows people to see stars in the sky that they would not normally be able to see. What a beautiful metaphor for depression and life.

“I used to think that focusing on the here and now was just a cute way of ignoring life. Now I see it’s the opposite: the here and now is life. Everything else is just self-talk.” pg 188 How extraordinary that Breel has been able to come to this conclusion so early in his life. I think that generally it takes folks longer to come to the realization that the world in your mind isn’t real, just a story.

I wish that our society could come up with better ways to address and treat mental illness than what we have figured out so far, but with books like Boy Meets Depression and Furiously Happy by Jenny Lawson I think that we have at least found a place to start the conversation.

Personal accounts of the darkness that dwells in our minds and the slow climb back into the light of wellness serve a purpose beyond a cathartic release for the author. It lets any of the book’s readers, who may be suffering with the same issues, realize that they’re not alone and that there are ways out. These books are like flashing exit signs to people who may be lost in a frighteningly dark place and I only hope that they find their way at the right time into the hands of the ones who need them most.

I received a free advance reading copy of this book through GoodReads First Reads program. Thanks for reading.

In the Skin of a Jihadist: Inside Islamic State’s Recruitment Networks by Anna Erelle

This book was scary.

First of all, I had no idea how widespread the problem of young men and women leaving their home country to wage jihad had become. Anna Erelle was almost effortlessly sucked in to a horrific situation that has actually happened to hundreds of young people from Europe.

She demonstrates how easily a young woman, who may be lonely, marginalized, or searching for meaning, could be swept away by a religious fanatic so that she could never return home.

Once these young people hit the Syrian border, their passports are taken so that, even if they changed their minds, they couldn’t go back. And, the worst part is that it happened so quickly. The events of In the Skin of a Jihadist occur over the course of one month.

Reading this as a parent, this book was a nightmare. One minute, your child is home with you- the next they’re on a one-way flight to Turkey and they’re never coming back.

As compelling as the story was, it suffered from some small translation problems. (It was originally written in French.)

Why, for example, did Anna get into that fight at the photojournalist party? I know that she was under pressure and had had too much to drink, but, if it had been me, I wouldn’t have punched a bouncer because I was upset about how my story was going. When everything soured, I would have packed my bags and taken the first flight home.

That probably only shows how she’s a more serious journalist than I am, but still. I felt as if I was missing some details about why she was behaving how she was and how the French police used her contacts and information to prosecute terrorists.

Overall though, it was a harrowing read. I learned more about Sharia law than I had known before I read this book and also about why people would chose that type of lifestyle- it was all profoundly disturbing.

Read In the Skin of a Jihadist if you want to know more about this issue but prepare yourself for some eye-opening revelations.

If you want to learn more about this topic, I’d recommend reading The Terrorist’s Son: A Story of Choice by Zak Ebrahim or I Am Nujood, Age 10 and Divorced by Nujood Ali.

I received a free copy of this book through GoodReads First Reads program. Thanks for reading!

The Confessions of Young Nero (Nero #1) by Margaret George

**Warning: minor spoilers ahead unless you’re familiar with Roman history.**

Margaret George has done it again and produced yet another triumph of historical fiction. This one follows the much maligned Nero from his humble beginnings in a lower branch of the imperial family tree to the prize itself, Roman emperor. Then, it ends on an epic cliff hanger, but I forgive her because it is so awesome. If you can’t handle that kind of wait, you may want to hold off on reading this until the next installment is out.

All I knew about Nero (before this book) was that he “fiddled while Rome burned.” George combines the research of a scientist with the storytelling ability of a master writer to bring this man’s story to life. I have to admit- I actually felt sorry for the guy. Yes, despite the orgies, outlandish expenditures, palatial living, and god-like status, poor Nero, like all of us, just wanted to be loved. At least, so says Margaret George.

“It was hard to keep the family… straight. There was so much intermarrying that everyone seemed related to everyone else.” loc 219. Like British aristocracy, the upper echelons of Roman society were actually quite small and so everyone actually knew each other very well. Their children married, they frequently divorced and remarried each other, and excuses were made for the very close marriages. Nero’s mother, for instance, marries her uncle. Abhorrent to modern eyes, perhaps, but like royalty from many different ages, somehow the rules were bent and it was allowed.

From his very earliest days, Nero watches others scheme, poison, and claw their way towards power. It really messes him up. “It was my first, and most brutal, lesson in what lengths to which evil people will go, and for what flimsy reasons. I have never forgotten it, nor let down my guard since. Let them call me cruel. Better that than dead.” loc 544, ebook. Just to put it into perspective, Nero’s uncle, the Emperor Caligula, once declared war on the god, Poseidon, and had his soldiers run into the ocean and stab the waves with their swords- totally bonkers. George suggests throughout the story that Nero is not only trying to outshine his relatives because of natural ambition, but also because he believes there is a curse in his blood. With an extended family like that, I can see his point.

George also does a good job bringing Rome and her curious attitudes about everyone not Roman to life. Nero is fond of the Greeks- their music, poetry, and athleticism. But, to the Romans, that sort of cultural appreciation is unmanly and unnatural. I think it was just an extension of the very human attitude of “us vs them” but Romans took it very badly when Nero wanted to perform music in public (gasp), wear a tunic rather than a toga (double gasp), and race a chariot in the Coliseum (passes out on the floor). These things were not done but Nero insisted on doing them. Compared to the things that celebrities get away with today, those behavioral peculiarities seem so tame.

“I learned to live with the knowledge I had; people can get used to anything, even horror, and it begins to feel normal. And the thought that I had inherited the blood of murderers seemed less threatening than that my mother… might kill me. Thus we make peace with ourselves and our weaknesses, for there is always someone worse to focus on.” loc 1732, ebook. Poor, poor Nero. Can you imagine being afraid that you’d die at the hand of your mother? It really makes one feel like her anxieties are rather trivial. Stressed about a dirty house? Yeah, Nero’s mom might kill him today or tomorrow or the next time he’s not paying attention. Get over it!

Highly recommended for fans of historical fiction, ancient Rome, or people who want to get lost in a story. Margaret George is amazing. I own four of her books and, when this is published, I just may have to pick it up too. Coming from a (former) librarian, this is really one of the highest compliments I can give to an author. Do yourself a favor, if you like this genre and haven’t tried her yet, pick up Margaret George.

Thank you to NetGalley and Berkley Publishing for a free advance reader copy of this book.

The Help Desk Book Blog

Sharing reviews and deep thoughts about life.

Don’t Let Anything Dull Your Sparkle: How to Break Free of Negativity and Drama by Doreen Virtue

On the Move: A Life (Oliver Sacks’ memoirs #2) by Oliver Sacks

Orlean Puckett: The Life of a Mountain Midwife by Karen Cecil Smith

Aerie (Magonia #2) by Maria Dahvana Headley

Rasputin’s Supernatural Dating Service by David D. Hammons

Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury

Boy Meets Depression: Or Life Sucks and Then You Live by Kevin Breel

In the Skin of a Jihadist: Inside Islamic State’s Recruitment Networks by Anna Erelle

The Confessions of Young Nero (Nero #1) by Margaret George

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