The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom by Miguel Ruiz, a review

The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom by Miguel Ruiz, a review
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The Four Agreements is a simple and short presentation of some very deep wisdom. In a world filled with spiritual reading material, this one’s a goodie. It just made a lot of sense to me.

These lessons come from the shamanic culture of Central America. “Toltec knowledge arises from the same essential unity of truth as all the sacred esoteric traditions found around the world. Though it is not a religion, it honors all the spiritual masters who have taught on the earth. While it does embrace spirit, it is most accurately described as a way of life, distinguished by the ready accessibility of happiness and love. introduction pg x.

Happiness and love! Sign up the author of The Light Congress, pronto.

The book goes on to talk about how everyone has unconscious beliefs that we pick up as children. We view and experience our world through these beliefs.

Most folks aren’t even aware that they have them and this causes a myriad of misunderstandings and problems: “We keep searching and searching, when everything is already within us. There is no truth to find. Wherever we turn our heads, all we see is the truth, but with the agreements and beliefs we have stored in our mind, we have no eyes for this truth. We don’t see the truth because we are blind. What blinds us are all those false beliefs we have in our mind.” pg 17.

So, how do you cut through the fog of these beliefs to see clearly? Ruiz suggests using The Four Agreements.

The first is: “be impeccable with your word… you begin to see all the changes that can happen in your life. Changes first in the way you deal with yourself, and later in the way you deal with other people, especially those you love the most.” pg 46.

This impeccability includes your inner voice, the way you talk to yourself, and how you narrate your reality.

Ruiz mentions that some people talk to themselves in a manner that they would find unacceptable to use with the people they care about. Change the way you speak and, Ruiz claims, your life will follow.

The second agreement is: “Whatever people do, feel, think, or say, don’t take it personally. If they tell you how wonderful you are, they are not saying that because of you.” pg 59

This is beneficial to you because: “When we really see other people as they are without taking it personally, we can never be hurt by what they say or do. Even if others lie to you, it is okay. They are lying to you because they are afraid. They are afraid you will discover that they are not perfect.” pg 63.

The third agreement is ‘don’t make assumptions’: “If others tell us something, we make assumptions, and if they don’t tell us something we make assumptions to fulfill our need to know and to replace the need to communicate.” pg 74. Now that I’ve been looking for this, I’ve caught myself assuming things all the time.

It’s funny how quick hurt feelings evaporate when I just put an “assumption” label over any stories I’ve concocted in my mind. It has actually been world-changing for me: to realize how many stories I make up because I’m bored or confused or simply don’t know what someone else is thinking. And to realize that they’re not real is such a relief. Really.

Finally: “Just do your best – in any circumstance in your life. It doesn’t matter if you are sick or tired, if you always do your best there is no way you can judge yourself. And if you don’t judge yourself there is no way you are going to suffer from guilt, blame, and self-punishment. By always doing your best, you will break a big spell that you have been under.” pg 85.

This was another big one for me. I used to get down on myself about how circumstances played out even if I had nothing to do with it. Now, I just pause and give it a quick think over, “Did I try my best?” Generally, yeah, I was trying my guts out.

And that’s all I can ask of myself, really. I can’t control the uncontrollable. I can only do the best I can with what I’ve got in front of me.

Here’s a little bit of Heidi Wiechert wisdom for readers of this review. Let’s call it the fifth and six agreements.

Make Time your friend. Rather than making snap judgments when inexplicable things happen to me, I do something similar to hitting record in my brain in order to think about it later, outside of the knee-jerk emotion of the moment. If something bugs you or scares you, write it down. Include the time and date for reference later.

The sixth agreement is … what were we just talking about? Oh, that’s right, a book review. Be in the moment. The past is passed and the future isn’t promised. We’ve got a lot of work to do; right here and right now.

The Four Agreements may help readers live in the now and experience life as it is rather than as they’ve imagined it to be. At least, that’s what it has done for me. Also recommended for readers who may be interested in spirituality but want a easy place to start. This one is simple and packs a big punch in a very few pages.

Thanks for reading!

Heidi

Light Congress gate symbolism (Remember, you pick your own. Here are my three.): quarry of childhood, telling the truth, a shadow

What’s the Light Congress? I thought you’d never ask: https://www.patreon.com/collection/2256731

The Shining Girls by Lauren Beukes

The Shining Girls by Lauren Beukes
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A killer travels through time picking his victims and leaving mementos behind.

I thought I’d venture outside of my comfort zone with The Shining Girls and I certainly managed that. It was far too gory and violent for me.

The trouble is that almost half of the story is told from the killer’s point of view. The reader gets a front row seat at the crimes, usually immediately after a series of passages describing the girl so that an emotional connection is formed with the victim.

I was on a run listening to the audiobook… now, let me be honest. I was on a mildly taxing walk listening to the audiobook and I had to turn it off when he attacked Kirby. It was simply too much with all of the horror, violence and the bit with the animal too.

Perhaps if I had been reading a physical book, I could have skimmed the awful bits. But even then, I think it would be safe to say that this was not the book for me.

I was really excited when Beukes introduced the reader to the newsroom of the Chicago newspaper. Her description of the reporter’s cubes all stacked up on one another with the sports and feature writers off to the side was eerily accurate to where I work.

I also enjoyed the interactions between Dan and Kirby- those two were snappy and fun.

Overall though, the gore of the story was too much for me. Only recommended for readers who can handle that type of thing.

Thanks for reading!

Etiquette & Espionage (Finishing School #1) by Gail Carriger

Etiquette & Espionage (Finishing School #1) by Gail Carriger
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A cute, young adult book with a steampunk theme that takes place at a “finishing” school which isn’t about etiquette at all.

I made the mistake of reading this without realizing that it was based in a world from another series of books. I’m guessing that I would have enjoyed it more if I had read the other set first.

Etiquette and Espionage had plenty of fun moments in it. One of my favorites is when Sophronia inexplicably claims that werewolves enjoy the theater. From one of the other books? I’m assuming so. But it sounds legit.

I also loved when one of the students bemoans the fact that she doesn’t believe she’ll ever be able to kill anyone and the teacher comforts her with the fact that she may never have to. What a relief.

But funny moments do not a story make. The plot centers around Sophronia’s introduction to a world filled with spies that she didn’t know existed, the concealment of a highly desirable piece of equipment that has something to do with wireless technology, and, of course, fashion.

It is funny, frivolous and frothy. I found that I wanted more substance. Recommended for a light summer read around the pool and, perhaps, you may want to read The Parasol Protectorate series first, starting with Soulless.

Thanks for reading!

Stronger by Jeff Bauman, Bret Witter

Stronger by Jeff Bauman, Bret Witter

strongerI am not a big news watcher. I try to keep up on current events, so I knew about the bombing at the Boston Marathon, but I didn’t watch the news broadcasts as they occurred nor did I see the (now famous) picture of Jeff Bauman being wheeled away from the bomb site. So, this whole book was a revelation and learning experience for me.

In a straight forward and honest manner, Jeff describes his life, what happened to him that tragic afternoon, and then how he and his family picked up the pieces of their lives and began to move on.

He also describes what happened at the shootout between Tsarnaev and the police from the officers’ point of view (he heard multiple first hand accounts from the men who were there). He details the trauma to his body and mind- some of it is very graphic, but that’s how he experienced it.

I think this was a very intimate memoir.

In addition to sharing his inner most thoughts and emotions, he doesn’t try to make the people in his life look better than they really are. For example, the portrait he paints of his mother is very unflattering. She tends to drink to excess and then vent her emotions while under the influence.

Apparently she has behaved this way Jeff’s entire life, so he doesn’t think much of it. It’s very dysfunctional, at best, and alcoholic, at worst. But, it’s real and not something that he had to share with the world.

Jeff chose to share it.

At multiple points in the book, Jeff denies that he’s a hero, but he is. He’s demonstrated the resiliency of the human spirit and sheer determination to move on with his life by learning to walk with his new legs a mere six months after the bombing.

I sincerely hope that his life continues to move forward and that he finds more peace than is detailed in his memoir. He deserves that, at least.

I received a free copy of this book through Goodreads First Reads. Thanks for reading!

Ink and Bone (The Great Library #1) by Rachel Caine

Ink and Bone (The Great Library #1) by Rachel Caine
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In Ink and Bone, knowledge and power is the name of the game.

“The Library holds itself to be the keeper of both knowledge and wisdom, but it is not true. So much should never be held in the hands of so few, for it is a natural, venal habit of men to hold to power. And knowledge is the purest form of power.” pg 51

Printed books, called originals, are now highly prized and illegal to own without a dispensation from the Library. The Library is an entity without borders as powerful as the church or a country, with soldiers and animated machines called automatons, protecting its buildings, holdings and librarians.

Not everyone follows the Library’s restrictions and a black market has formed for books. Jess and his family of smugglers runs and sells books at great threat to life and limb. Other factions also resist the Library. They’re called Burners and they destroy books with Greek fire, a dangerous and deadly concoction that burns flesh as easily as paper.

“The original scroll had been destroyed by a Burner at the Alexandrian Library ages ago, but there had been one copy made. … Owning it carried a death penalty. When you steal a book, you steal from the world, the Library propaganda said, and Jess supposed it might be true.” pg 22, ebook.

Jess’ smuggler father decides that he needs eyes and ears on the inside of the most powerful institute in the world, so he arranges an opportunity for Jess to join the Library. And that is where this story really begins.

The beginning of Ink and Bone bothered me because of its obvious parallels to Harry Potter. A promising young boy on his way to a magical school boards a train and meets a slightly bumbling, shy boy and the smartest girl in his class. But after that cliche “train introduction”, the story improves.

While reading this story, I was reminded of the divide between those who love holding traditional books in their hands and ebook readers. The Library has discovered a magical method to use tablets and change the words on the page, very similar to ebooks: “Do you agree it should be wrong to own original works?” Of course, Jess knew he ought to say; it was the standard answer. The Library was never wrong. But something made him say, “I’m not sure.” That woke a glint in Wolfe’s eyes. “Why not?” “I’d like to hold one,” Jess said, quite honestly. “To feel the weight and history of it in my hands. A blank can’t be the same, sir.” “No,” Wolfe agreed. “A blank is a poor, pale imitation, though the words are arranged in precisely the same order; it is the difference between an idea and a physical thing.” pg 61, ebook. I enjoy both books and ebooks, but I can see why a reader would prefer one over another.

I enjoyed the general ideas of this book, but between the warring factions, actual wars, magic, alchemy, Library history, twin brother, character backgrounds, book burners or eaters, teenage romance and angst, the story lost its cohesiveness. Caine could have written three different stories with the material contained in one.

Beyond simplifying the story elements, I just couldn’t get over the fact that the librarians weren’t good guys. Yes, I’m biased. 🙂 But every librarian I’ve ever known has been a guardian of knowledge, not gate-keeping tyrants.

Recommended for readers who enjoy their young adult fantasy a little scattered and who are open to the idea of sinister librarian-types.

Sons of Ares (Sons of Ares, #1) by Pierce Brown

Sons of Ares (Sons of Ares, #1) by Pierce Brown
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A comic that claims is going to give us the backstory of the Sons of Ares. But, in this entry, it just rehashes what goes on in the Gold school with an intro and conclusion teaser.

For anyone who hasn’t had the chance to read Red Rising, you’d need that backstory. For someone like me, who has, I wanted more new details. I didn’t get them.

I suspect that these comics, another coming out in June, are whetting the appetites of readers for the 2018 debut of Iron Gold. (Can’t wait, by the way.)

The art is beautiful but not breath-taking or highly stylized like Monstress, Vol. 1: Awakening.

The story takes place in a world I’ve come to love. But, it was only 32 pages and that was not enough.

On the other hand, I actually bought this comic. I wasn’t patient enough to recommend it for purchase at the library and then wait to see if they picked it up. I had to have it NOW. That says something for how much I love it. Having worked as a librarian, I take my book purchasing very seriously.

If you’re not a die-hard fan like me, you may want to wait until the libraries get their hands on it. As I said, this entry doesn’t give the reader much beyond a small window into Brown’s world. If you’re satisfied with crumbs, buy it now.

Thanks for reading!

Fox Tossing, Octopus Wrestling and Other Forgotten Sports by Edward Brooke-Hitching

Fox Tossing, Octopus Wrestling and Other Forgotten Sports by Edward Brooke-Hitching

foxtossingThe moral of today’s story is that people used to do terrible things to animals in the name of “sport.” Interspersed with fascinating tidbits about dueling with rubber bullets and auto polo, Fox Tossing, Octopus Wrestling and Other Forgotten Sports documents the nauseating practices of bear, dog and monkey baiting and more- so much more.

It describes mass hunts conducted in arenas by royalty and nobles were hundreds, if not thousands, of animals were slaughtered as entertainment. From shooting arrows at roosters to breaking apart a barrel with a cat inside, I could not believe the brutality.

If you can make it through the animal abuse sports, and I confess that I skimmed most of those, what’s left is amazing. “… from learning about how our ancestors entertained themselves we gain a unique insight into broader contemporary attitudes towards morality, humor, and the trials of daily existence.” pg 3. “The reasons why these forgotten sports fell out of favor are, of course, many and varied, but broadly speaking can be divided into three categories: cruelty, danger, and ridiculousness.” pg 5.

Ah, balloon jumping. This is a sport where a dude would attach a huge balloon to himself and leap across the landscape like a superhero. Why did we quit balloon jumping? “He did nearly clear the electrified cables, but unfortunately his feet became entangled, and when he tried to extract himself by grabbing one of the wires he was blown to the ground in a hail of sparks, dying instantly. Alas, balloon jumpers never quite managed to refine the sport to a level of safety below “frequently lethal”…” pg 24.

Then there was dwile flonking: “In mid-1960’s Norfolk, it became a favorite activity of locals to gather in a large group, dance to an accordion, and hit each other in the face with beer-soaked rags.” pg 87. What fun.

I would say that the practice of “flyting” is alive and well in some online forums: “Flytings were extemporary swearing matches that placed a value on the imagination and verbal dexterity of the participants, who would exchange insults with impressive wordplay in a sense similar to modern rap battles, but with an intensity of vitriol and florid vocabulary that is hard to fully comprehend by modern standards.” pg 101. But not on Goodreads, where civil discourse rules the day. 🙂

Recommended for trivia hounds and those interested in obscure history, Fox Tossing is full of hilarious and heart-breaking facts about some of mankind’s forgotten pastimes. Those who are triggered by animal cruelty would be best served by picking a different book.

Thanks for reading!

I Hope I Screw This Up: How Falling in Love with Your Fears Can Change the World by Kyle Cease

I Hope I Screw This Up: How Falling in Love with Your Fears Can Change the World by Kyle Cease

ihopeiI Hope I Screw This Up is a part-diary, part-spiritual evolution manual and 100 percent the Hippie Librarian’s type of read. Kyle Cease shares his thoughts and personal path towards becoming his best self. I didn’t find it to be as funny as promised in the blurb, but I do think it has worth as, “another finger pointing towards the moon,” as Eckhart Tolle would say.

The beginning of this book is hard to get through- for the writer and the reader. Kyle explores his fears and inability to get started. But, he slowly gets into his groove and, boy, does he begin flowing. Here’s the start of the turn-around: “You would have sensed my inauthenticity immediately if I was feeling fear in every ounce of my body and I just overlooked it in order to write the “right” thing. Instead, by baring my soul and telling you what I’m actually experiencing, I’m freeing myself from the pain I would otherwise be hiding and holding on to. Something I’ve learned is that sharing my deepest truth, no matter how scary it is in the moment, is freedom.” loc 48, ebook. And he’s off to the races.

“Just because I haven’t done this before doesn’t mean that I can’t access the ability to write the most amazing book that has ever been written. We all have the exact same level of ability to access the unlimited creativity available in every moment.” loc 158, ebook. I believe that too-
humanity’s ability to access unlimited creativity every moment. I suppose I believe that Kyle could write the most amazing book that has ever been written. Does he do it in this tome? I guess that depends upon how well you’re able to connect with what he’s done.

I enjoyed this discussion about the limitations of the mind: “Your mind is constantly putting you in survival mode all day so it can protect itself from what it thinks will be death, and unfortunately, your mind thinks almost everything is death.” loc 224, ebook. Isn’t that the truth.

And he touches on some of the problems with the New Age movement: “I know it sounds weird to say that sadness is actually a good thing, but the societal lie is that it’s better to be happy than to be sad. That’s just a belief that our mind created. … one of the strongest things you can do is to actually feel the emotions that you’re experiencing.” loc 510. Every emotion has a time and place. The insistence upon positivity at any cost, doesn’t work. Serenity now, insanity later… yes?

He also goes into the life-changing benefits of meditation, which I also agree with. By slowing down and taking the time to go within, your inner being speaks to you and gives you guidance: “Every single one of us has this calling within us, but most people are so locked into the habits and distractions they’ve created in their life that they can’t hear it. It doesn’t take anything special to discover what that calling is or what it wants you to do; all you have to do is turn down the volume of your distractions and listen.” loc 706. It may sound weird if you haven’t experienced it yet but it’s true.

For the most part, Kyle keeps his book in this dimension of reality and doesn’t dip into the far-out. But, there is a part where he briefly jokes about a picture of himself and how, at the universal energy level, we’re all the same. So, technically, you’re looking at a picture of yourself in the book that you wrote, even though it seems that you’re looking at a picture of him in a book that he wrote. That could be a bridge too far for some readers, but the Hippie Librarian took it all in stride.

Enthusiasts of Eckhart Tolle and Abraham Hicks will probably enjoy Kyle Cease. He’s authentic in the way that spiritual teachers are, understandable and amusing. He also makes a good case for falling in love with your fears. Now, the hard part, to practice it.

Thank you to Netgalley and North Star Way publishing for a free digital copy of this book. Reminder: the brief quotations that I pulled from the advance reader’s text may differ slightly in the final printed version.

Thanks for reading!

The Infinite Sea (The 5th Wave, #2) by Rick Yancey

The Infinite Sea (The 5th Wave, #2) by Rick Yancey
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Gritter and more disturbing than The 5th Wave, Cassie, Ben, Ringer, et al are still trying to survive the end of the world. The mystery of the aliens increases. The manner in which the war against humanity is waged sinks to new lows. Yancey takes the story on some unexpected turns and I liked them.

The pace of this story is relentless and the lines are blurred between the “good guys” and the “bad guys.” It gives you a tension headache if you don’t take a break from it every couple of chapters. At least, it did for me. “Anyway, no debt is ever fully repaid, not really, not the ones that really matter. You saved me, he said, and back then I didn’t understand what I had saved him from. … Now I was thinking he didn’t mean I saved him from anything, but for something.” pg 128.

But for what! Yancey answers most of the questions he introduced the reader to in The 5th Wave. He also weaves in some complications. I won’t say anything about those… but they’re very serious and deadly. “No one can be trusted,” I said. “Not even a child.” The cold bored down to my bones and curled inside the marrow.” pg 148.

“I understand the game within the game now: There is nothing private, nothing sacred. There is no part of me hidden from him. My stomach churns with revulsion. He’s violated more than my memories. He’s molesting my soul.” pg 188. The aliens still seem to have the upper hand with the technology that can peer into people’s minds. With all of the creepy things in these books, that bit bothered me the most.

Will our intrepid teenage-survivalists solve the mystery of what the invaders want or what they are before everyone is dead? I don’t know… but I’m going to read the last book and find out. Recommended for young adults or the young-at-heart who enjoy dystopian/mystery thrill-rides.

Thanks for reading!