Set Your Voice Free: How to Get the Singing or Speaking Voice You Want by Roger Love

Set Your Voice Free was page after page of life changing revelations to me. I picked this book up because I was trying to address a specific problem.

When I speak in front of groups, nerves take over and I subconsciously close my throat, cutting off my air, making my voice weak, and losing my message in my process. I didn’t know that was what I was doing until I read this book. I just thought that my voice changed, but I didn’t know how or why.

Roger has changed all that for me and I’m so excited to put his suggestions into practice.

A world class speech and singing coach, Roger has helped many famous and every day people find their voices. “The most profound discovery I’ve made in the past fifteen years is this: If you know how to control the pitch, pace, tone, volume, and melody of your voice- the elements that form the core of this book- you can consciously use them to guide the emotions of your listeners and magnify the impact of every communication you have.” loc 85-109, ebook.

He goes on to list countless exercises and examples of just that. A consummate teacher, Roger includes almost every vocal problem imaginable in Set Your Voice Free as well as situations in which one would need to put her best voice forward.

Like visual impact, Roger tells us that audiences form their opinions about speakers and singers quickly, taking only one second of vocalizing to come to their conclusions. So, he says, you want to utilize that fleeting moment to make the best impression that you can.

It all starts with the breath: “The magic that I work with voices is built on a fundamental rhythm: the movements of the body as you inhale and exhale. Breathing smoothly and deeply works wonders for the body in general. … Once you learn to breathe as calmly and steadily as a child does, you are on your way to fabulous vocal reaches.” loc 808, ebook.

Intellectually, I knew how breathing worked and, demonstrably, I’ve been breathing my whole life, but Roger gave me a complete education about what deep breathing FEELS and SOUNDS like. I can see how this book could be life changing for readers as it has been for me.

In addition to vocal exercises, Roger includes stage and bodily movement, mixing them with the voice to create the total package. “All stage movement can be reduced to a simple pattern, and when you know how to use it, you can simply and effectively maneuver in front of any audience anywhere.” loc 3270, ebook.

Performers and speakers all types will find information worth knowing in this book. “When you begin to put yourself and your ideas clearly and thoughtfully into the world, with all the energy you feel, people will notice. Their new attention and interest may make you feel self-conscious, but keep using the techniques you’ve learned. You’ll be a more active, influential player in your life, instead of being pushed to the sidelines.” loc 4406, ebook. Everyone wants that.

Very highly recommended for anyone who speaks, sings, or wants to more mindfully express their message. Set Your Voice Free will help anyone who reads it turn his or her voice into a finely tuned instrument of communication.

Perfect for beginners to well seasoned artists and speakers- it contains something for everyone. Some similar reads to help you put your best self forward: Platform: Get Noticed in a Noisy World, Talk Like TED: The 9 Public-Speaking Secrets of the World’s Top Minds, or The Art of Exceptional Living.

Thank you to NetGalley and Little, Brown and Company for a free advance reader’s copy of this book! And, thank you for reading!

Let’s Explore Diabetes with Owls by David Sedaris

David Sedaris is a unique American humorist. Sometimes I love his essays and other times I hate them, so ranking a collection of his work fairly is difficult.

I listened to the audiobook of Let’s Explore Diabetes with Owls on my daily commute and he’s a wonderful narrator.

Actually, having read a handful of his other books, I’d recommend listening to him read his essays. His timing and inflections are perfection. He’s one of the few humorists who has literally made me laugh out loud.

The high points of this collection are Understanding Understanding Owls, Laugh Kookaburra, and A Guy Walks into a Bar Car. They’re unbelievably funny and have a lot of heart.

The low points were: Health-Care Freedoms and Why I want my Country Back, If I Ruled the World, and Dog Days. It’s as if he ran out of material and tacked the worst of it on the end.

Dog Days was awful and reminded me of Squirrel Seeks Chipmunk: A Modest Bestiary which I couldn’t stand. Vulgar prose just isn’t my thing, I guess.

Recommended for adult readers who are looking for a laugh and don’t mind some profanity and general silliness. More humorous books that I’ve enjoyed: Are You There, Vodka? It’s Me, Chelsea, Dad Is Fat, and It’s All Relative: Two Families, Three Dogs, 34 Holidays, and 50 Boxes of Wine.

Creativity: The Perfect Crime by Philippe Petit

In Creativity, Philippe invites the reader into his mind and attempts to dissect his creative process. For this to make any sense, you sort of have to let go of reality as you know it and step into his pipe dream world for the duration of the read.

Sometimes I was able to do this and followed his twisting train of thought to some fascinating conclusions, but other times I couldn’t. So, if you pick this one up, prepare yourself. It’s not for everyone.

I marked a couple of his ideas that resonated with me:“If you are an artist, you want to create a giant wall around yourself and, inside that wall, to follow your honesty and your intuition. What the audience will see is a man or woman who is a prisoner of his or her passion, and that is the most inspiring performance in the world.” pg 16 “To be a prisoner of passion”- I’ve never heard an artist described that way before.

In pages 20 to 26, Philippe essentially describes his brainstorming process as a paper version of Pinterest (my comparison, not his). He takes all of these words and pictures and files them according to some associations that his mind makes, then reassembles the results into art… somehow.

Read these pages if you want to explore how difficult it is for a creative type to write down his process in a manner that makes sense to anyone other than him or herself. It’s interesting but baffling.

“Another theory of mine: turning in circles and getting lost is important! You find yourself when you get lost.” pg 28 I embrace that theory as well.

“Go to school if you want to learn. Go to life if you want to feel.” pg 85 Loved that.

“Use your creative paranoia to be on the lookout for negativity; observe with a positive spirit: “What a beautiful disaster!” uttered the French architect Le Corbusier when he visited Manhattan for the first time.” pg 100

“Even if you are not a performer, even if you don’t have an act, do not think that you have nothing to rehearse! The art of living makes a performing artist out of you.” pg 122 We are all creators, painting our lives in wide strokes around us, even those of us who can’t draw a stick figure or walk on a rope between skyscrapers.

“Look in the mirror of fear and focus beyond it. What appears in the background is your path, awaiting.” pg 149 Something to keep in mind when life’s anxieties and impossibilities assail you.

Creativity: The Perfect Crime is one of a kind but if you liked it, I’d recommend reading PostSecret: Extraordinary Confessions from Ordinary Lives by Frank Warren (hundreds of people around the country decorate plain postcards with a secret that they’ve never revealed to another person- it shows the heights and depths of creativity and artistic catharsis) or How to Fly a Horse: The Secret History of Creation, Invention, and Discovery by Kevin Ashton (a more logical than emotional book about the creative process, how it works, and how everybody can create).

Speaking of Philippe Petit, did anybody else watch The Walk with Joseph Gordon-Levitt which was about his famous tight rope walk between the Twin Towers?

If you read this book first, it makes so much more sense.

Thanks for reading!

Your Inner Critic Is a Big Jerk: And Other Truths About Being Creative by Danielle Krysa

A quirky little book about how to inspire your own creativity and how to use your inner negative voice to its best advantage. Martha Rich’s art elevates what is actually rather simple text, but, on a more positive note, it is a quick read for those who may be short on time.

I couldn’t help but draw similarities between this book and Unmistakable: Why Only Is Better Than Best, which I read last week. Your Inner Critic is a Big Jerk deals with the sensitive parts of the creative process and breaking through your fears about how your art will be received.

Unmistakable is more about why you need to create the art that only you can create and how a bunch of different artists have managed to do just that. But, if you’re looking to jump start your creativity this year, pick up both of these because they actually complement each other fairly well.

One of my take-aways from Your Inner Critic is that it is never too late to start doing what you do: “Far too often, people tell me, “I wish I hadn’t given up on art [or dancing, acting, writing, music], but it’s too late now.” What! Why? I don’t believe that for a second. Many amazingly talented people didn’t hit their stride until their thirties, forties, or later.” pg 20

And Krysa goes on to list such luminaries as van Gogh, Money, and Julia Child. Can you believe that!

Even if you didn’t go to school to learn whatever art you feel compelled to create, you are still an artist. I’ve been pricked by that negative inner whisper once or twice and it was cathartic to learn that I’m not alone in that struggle and to finally put it to rest: “If you want to learn something new, go learn something new. Set yourself up to get this new skill in whichever way suits you best. You are what you know, regardless of when and where you did the learning.” pg 45

Some further reading: Unmistakable: Why Only Is Better Than Best or Creativity: The Perfect Crime

Thanks for reading!

I’m Just a Person by Tig Notaro

Tig Notaro is a survivor. Her dry humor shines through these pages as she tells her life story: multiple brushes with death, romantic relationships, and snapshots of her childhood, parents, and thought processes.

She shows us that she’s “just a person”, yes, but also how extraordinary an ordinary person can be when presented with nearly insurmountable difficulties like dropping out of school at an early age, having a biological father who was never present and a stepfather who was never available emotionally, a mother who was so immature that Tig practically raised herself, not to mention all of the health problems that came later.

I picked up this book because I was enamored of Tig’s stand-up routines. This book has their flavor but far more detail than her act- if you’ve enjoyed her comedy, you’ll probably like this too.

I loved reading about how Tig found her calling and her people: “I began to refer to the comedy scene as “the land of misfit toys.” It was comforting to be surrounded by people who didn’t fit into the confines of society, and it was the first time in my life that I wasn’t met with the boring conversation stopper: “Oh my God, you’re so weird.” pg 47

This part cracked me up- Tig’s discovered lumps in her breasts but she doesn’t think they’re anything to be concerned about. Her girlfriend disagreed: “Instead of making a doctor’s appointment, I spent the next couple months teasing Brooke by removing my shirt and saying, “Hey, wanna touch my cancer?” It was really fun to walk past her holding my chest and blurting out, “Ow! My cancer!” pg 109-110.

I thought that the chapter in which Tig talks about her biological father, Pat, was particularly well-written. She takes complex emotional pain and makes it into something beautiful: “He was obviously still in pain over the loss of my mother and the news of my health, but I knew that this grief could not kindle any real kind of familial bond between us. I guess I believed there was something inherently broken in Pat’s relationship with me and my brother. Maybe we had all missed some ambiguous window of time when we could have salvaged some hope for a real connection. I am certain, however, that we have the same feelings: I want everything to be okay for him and he wants everything to be okay for me.” pg 205

That is Tig’s strength- her ability to take the worst in life and wring not just humor but meaning out of it. Some similar reads: Sleepwalk With Me and Other Painfully True Stories, Shrinkage: Manhood, Marriage, and the Tumor That Tried to Kill Me, or A Girl Named Zippy.

Thanks for reading!

Unmistakable: Why Only is Better than Best by Srinivas Rao

A call-to-action for artists and business people of all types to create the work that only they can create which makes them irreplaceable and also Unmistakable.

“When you’re the only person who could have created a work of art, the competition and standard metrics by which things are measured become irrelevant because nothing can replace you. The factors that distinguish you are so personal that nobody can replicate them.” pg 2.

That makes sense to me. You’re essentially writing the book so no one can tell you how it’s supposed to go.

The theory of becoming Unmistakable is fairly simple but the journey to that place is not. There are no maps to this realm because it is different for everyone and the paths to that place vary as widely as the talents that people bring with them.

As Srinivas reminds us: “Unmistakable work is a process of self-discovery. We start our ride not knowing what it is that makes us unmistakable, and a thread reveals itself through the creation of a body of work. Dots connect, patterns emerge, and our unmistakable gift is revealed. Time is the critical ingredient required for this to take place, hence the role of longevity and commitment in the quest to become unmistakable.” pgs 56-57

So, you can’t give up. Create and fail and try again. That is as hard and as easy as it is.

“…creating unmistakable work might be one of the hardest things to do: you have to look into the depths of who you are, explore what matters to you, and infuse that into every element of your work until it can’t possibly be mistaken for something anybody could have done but you.” pg 68.

The messages contained within Unmistakable become repetitive after a few chapters, but Srinivas threads some of the stories and artists from his podcast to break up the material as well as his personal testimony.

Unmistakable encourages creation even in areas that you may have no prior experience: “Lack of formal instruction might keep us from attempting some sort of creative pursuit or starting anything in which we don’t have experience. … When we lack experience, we also have the advantage of lacking preconceived notions of what’s possible.” pg 113.

And, you don’t know what you’re capable of until you get started. So, what are we waiting for!

As Srinivas writes from an interview with Seth Godin: “The enemy of creativity is fear; that seems pretty clear. The enemy of fear is creativity; that doesn’t seem that obvious.” The antidote to our fear is to put our heads down, do our work, and make something each day.”pg 189.

Let’s all become Unmistakable.

Some further reading: Creativity: The Perfect Crime, Do the Work, and How to Fly a Horse: The Secret History of Creation, Invention, and Discovery.

Thanks for reading!

The Awakening Body: Somatic Meditation for Discovering Our Deepest Life by Reginald Ray

I picked up The Awakening Body because of a conversation I had with a friend last week. He said that when he sits down to meditate, that his mind won’t shut off, and it ruins the experience for him.

I gave him a technique about focusing on the space between thoughts, but decided that I needed something more concrete to give him. This book is perfect for anyone who feels like they can’t escape from his or her own mind.

The Awakening Body is a series of progressive meditations that take the practitioner out of “thinking” and into “experiencing”.

It’s as easy as focusing on your own toes: “In contrast to contrived conventional approaches that emphasize entry into the meditative state through the intentional thinking of the conscious mind… Somatic Meditation develops a meditative consciousness that is accessed through the spontaneous feelings, sensations, visceral intuitions, and felt senses of the body itself. … Put in the language of Buddhism, the human body, as such, is already and always abiding in the meditative state, the domain of awakening- and we are just trying to gain entry into that.” loc 110, ebook.

The teachings themselves are Buddhist in origin but you don’t have to be a practicing Buddhist to receive benefit from them. If you have a body, you can successfully do these meditations.

And the benefits from them could be enormous: “It is as if we are waking up, within our Soma (body consciousness), and we suddenly find ourselves in a new world. … We begin to see that what we formerly took to be our body was just a made-up version with little correspondence to anything real. We find in our body previously unimaginable vistas of spaciousness, experience arising that is ever surprising and fresh, an endless world of possibilities for ourselves and our lives.” loc 329, ebook.

This book includes a link to access the guided meditations online so that you can completely focus on the practice as it unfolds. I am just beginning to work with these, but I am encouraged by my progress so far.

When I started, I couldn’t sense my big toes at all, which kind of freaked me out. Logically, I knew they was there, but I couldn’t feel them.

Ray says that this isn’t uncommon: “When we arrive at the first instruction, “pay attention to your big toe on each foot,” at first, practitioners may not be able to do this because, they often report, they have no feeling not only of their toes, but often of their feet, their legs, or even the lower half of their body. … “Keep trying,” I tell them. For even directing our attention to the vicinity of where we think the toes should or might be is already transforming our neurological wiring.” loc 1215, ebook.

That was a big wake up call for me. I’m so glad I picked this book up.

The last part of the book was the most challenging for me to understand because Ray begins to speak directly to those who have had experience with Somatic meditation. I read the words, but I can’t say that I grasped their meaning… yet. With time, perhaps I will.

I recommend The Awakening Body to anyone who is looking for a slightly different technique to begin or improve his or her meditation practice. Beginners to advanced practitioners will find this book useful.

Some further books to explore if you are interested in using/sensing the body in meditation: Ecstatic Body Postures: An Alternate Reality Workbook or Meditations for Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself.

Thank you to NetGalley and Shambhala Publications for a free digital copy of this book! And, thank you for reading!

The Princess Diarist by Carrie Fisher

Take a highly intelligent, anxiety prone girl, mix in the life changing, world wide phenomena that is Star Wars, and add a dash of handsome, introverted, and married leading man and you have: The Princess Diarist.

This is not really about Star Wars as much as it is about obsession and Carrie trying to figure out who she is.

Though there are some tidbits sprinkled throughout: “And as much as I may have joked about Star Wars over the years, I liked that I was in those films. Particularly as the only girl in an all-boy fantasy. They were fun to make. It was an anecdote of unimaginable standing.” pg 5.

Or the moment Carrie found out that she got the part: “…I laughed and dropped the phone and ran out into the front yard and into the street. … It was raining in L.A. and I was Princess Leia. I had never been Princess Leia before and now I would be her forever. I would never not be Princess Leia. I had no idea how profoundly true that was and how long forever was.” pg 31

Carrie’s not afraid to make fun of herself: “When you watch the movie, it turns out that the voice I used when I was upset was vaguely British, and my not-upset voice is less British.” pg 44.

Or confess her hopeless awkwardness around her co-star: “But one thing I knew was that Harrison made me feel very nervous. I got tongue-tied in his company, and clumsy. It was uncomfortable in the extreme, and not in any way I could over come with a few well-chosen witticisms. We met, hit a wall, and stayed there. pg 61.

I’ve known someone who had that kind of effect on me. Poor Carrie.. poor me. 🙂

Here’s an actual entry from her diary that includes a mention of George Lucas: “George says that if you look at the person someone chooses to have “a relationship” with, you’ll see what they think of themselves. So Harrison is what I think of myself. It’s hardly a relationship, but nevertheless he is a choice. … I can’t think about it anymore. It makes my head hurt.” pg 114.

The older journal entries were my favorite part, but I can see how some readers may not enjoy them. They’re written in stream of consciousness and, at one point, I think Carrie flirts with a full on psychotic break- there’s a particularly disturbing entry about a rainbow colored talking fish that you can’t miss!

After the “Carrison” portion of the book, there’s some cringe worthy moments revealed between Carrie and mega Star Wars fans. Yes, she may have become a household name, but it doesn’t seem like it was worth the price.. or was it?

All of this just makes me want to watch Episode IV again! Read The Princess Diarist if you want to touch the depths of despair in a decades old love affair or if you want some quirky details about one of the most beloved science fiction films of all time. Also recommended: Fisher’s Shockaholic in which she details her struggles with bipolar disorder.

Thanks for reading!

Running with a Police Escort: Tales from the Back of the Pack by Jill Grunenwald

A Cleveland librarian chronicles the emergence of her inner road warrior. Jill was very unhealthy- tipping the scales at nearly 300 pounds when an email from her younger sister convinced her that she needs to change her ways.

Self described “slow runner”, Jill often finds herself at the end of races with organizers closing the course behind her. Thus the title of her eventual podcast and this book: Running with a Police Escort.

Jill reminded me of my younger sister, another “slow runner” who took up running for health reasons.

I have a great deal of respect for people who have the courage to make major life changes- be that taking up a sport, counting calories, or giving up meat products.

It is so easy to let life determine who you are becoming instead of taking full responsibility for your choices. Jill’s point in this memoir is that it doesn’t matter how fast or slow you go, you win if you’re making even the smallest steps towards your goals.

In this passage, she’s closing down the race, like usual: “…I happened to see one of the policemen on the street gesture to get my attention and point to the car following me. I pulled out my earbuds and from the sidewalk he called out with a supportive smile, “You must be a very important person to have a police escort!” loc 72, ebook.

Jill relates her unathletic/uncoordinated childhood and I felt a lot of sympathy for her bookworm tendencies: “While (my classmates) ran wild, I’d find a quiet corner along the brick wall of the building and bury myself in a book. My favorites were the Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark series, the macabre illustrations haunting my dreams.” loc 162, ebook.

That probably would have been one of my favorites too, but my school library’s copy was always checked out. Not that I’m bitter or anything.

Jill reminds the reader that people don’t get to nearly 300 pounds without a reason why- an underlying pain that they’re insulating themselves from. For Jill, it seems that she was chronically lacking in self esteem and self love.

I loved reading about her getting her mojo back: Truthfully, I didn’t even know how much I weighed because the analog scale that I owned didn’t go up that high. … I don’t know if I can verbally express what it means to be so heavy that you literally outweigh your scale’s capabilities. Like, seriously. Just think about that for a second, okay? A scale has a pretty basic function… and I had gotten so big, I put my scale out of work.” loc 312, ebook.

Running with a Police Escort is a great book for those who are struggling with their weight or the decision to become more healthy.

Jill isn’t afraid to laugh at herself and there is quite a lot of wisdom in these pages: “…it’s these simple decisions that compound as we make them every single second of every single moment of every single day. It is not the Friday nights or Saturday evenings that determine who we are and where we go: it is the Thursday afternoons or Monday mornings that mentor and counsel our being into a full-fledged sense of self.” loc 818, ebook.

Beware, there’s a bunch of swearing too. If you don’t appreciate that, you may have to find another book.

I also found it to be repetitive after the first couple of races, but it’s clear that Jill is writing from the heart and has been changed by every single mile that she’s undertaken. Share this book with others who may need encouragement because Jill is a natural cheerleader for the novice runner or athlete of any type.

Some further reading: Confessions of an Unlikely Runner: A Guide to Racing and Obstacle Courses for the Averagely Fit and Halfway Dedicated, Running Like a Girl, and Down Size: 12 Truths for Turning Pants-Splitting Frustration into Pants-Fitting Success.

Thank you to NetGalley and Skyhorse Publishing for a free advance reading copy of this book!

Thanks for reading!

The Help Desk

Sharing reviews and deep thoughts about life.

Category: Non-Fiction

Set Your Voice Free: How to Get the Singing or Speaking Voice You Want by Roger Love

Let’s Explore Diabetes with Owls by David Sedaris

Creativity: The Perfect Crime by Philippe Petit

Your Inner Critic Is a Big Jerk: And Other Truths About Being Creative by Danielle Krysa

I’m Just a Person by Tig Notaro

Unmistakable: Why Only is Better than Best by Srinivas Rao

The Awakening Body: Somatic Meditation for Discovering Our Deepest Life by Reginald Ray

The Princess Diarist by Carrie Fisher

Running with a Police Escort: Tales from the Back of the Pack by Jill Grunenwald

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