Level Up Your Life: How to Unlock Adventure and Happiness by Becoming the Hero of Your Own Story by Steve Kamb

Steve Kamb, the creator of nerdfitness.com, offers behavioral games and community support to assist readers in becoming their best self. It’s the self help genre meets gamification.

Steve was addicted to video games, miserable at his job and disappointed with life. “I still love those games and movies and enjoy the entertainment they provide. They’re a part of who I am as a person. The problem was that they had become a way to avoid the unhappiness in my real life while also allowing me to continue doing nothing about it.” pg xi

The game that had him hopelessly hooked was EverQuest. “What had begun as a fun way to blow off some steam after school or work quickly became an addiction.” pg 5.

So, Steve took what he loved best about the game- the levels, the endless quests, the secrets- and created an online community in which the members support each other to become the best whatever-it-is you want to be through just those things.

Photo by RODNAE Productions on Pexels.com

Essentially, Steve takes the hero’s journey, as described by Joseph Campbell, and crafts a way to implement that into your life through your own preferences. “Life is meant to be lived on your own terms.” pg 23

I picked this up because I recently read a behavioral game book and I wanted to see what the theory would look like in action. Steve has done a solid job making his game completely customizable.

He provides examples between the chapters of people who have used his game to “level up” their lives. The results are impressive.

“The truth is that most people fear change. They, themselves, might want to change but don’t want to put forth the effort and energy to make it happen.”pg 57.

With Level Up Your Life, Steve gives readers the tools to make their lives into a game of their choosing. Recommended for gamers and the young at heart.

Thanks for reading!

The Power of Charm: How to Win Anyone Over in Any Situation by Brian Tracy and Ron Arden

The Power of Charm is a book written for business professionals, who want to give themselves a bit of a leg up, by increasing their charm potential.

I found the book to be interesting, but it also flirts with the line between charming and manipulating. I suppose we could ask ourselves if, at the end of the day, there is any difference between the two.

Personally, I think there is.

In my mind, charm is unrehearsed, natural and springs from a genuine interest in others. Manipulation is ego-driven scheming. But, both can get you what you want.

I’m torn as to how this book actually fell on that scale. Some of the exercises feel like charm practices- others, like manipulation strategies.

Essentially, Brian Tracy and Ron Arden give listening and speaking tips to better understand whoever it is you’re interacting with. There’s nothing all that manipulative about polishing your communication skills.

On the other hand, in the chapter entitled: “Do Your Homework” in which the authors say, “Anytime you are getting together with someone, socially or professionally, whom you particularly want to impress, do your homework. Learn what you can about that person before you actually meet. It’s the best way to be charming and interesting to others.” pg 107. It didn’t sit so well with me.

Here’s why- Tracy gives the following story as an example: “I learned of a successful business owner with a crack sales team who was discontented with the company he was representing. … In asking around, I discovered that he was heavily into numerology and made all his decisions based on the numbers of the birth dates of potential business partners… One of his first questions of me was my birthday. I was prepared. I told him that it was a certain day, month, and year that added up to a ‘lucky number’ for business relationships. … The preparation was the key.” pg 108.

That smacks to me of manipulation rather than charm. What do you think?

On the other hand, I seriously appreciated the tips on how to become a better conversationalist. I’ve got some work to do there.

Generally, I let my fast-talking husband take the lead in social conversations because he always has something to say. I see now how that may be a disservice to others who may want to get to know me better.

“The Secret of Charm: The deepest craving of human nature is the need to feel valued and valuable. The secret of charm is therefore simple: make others feel important.” pg 12.

It is as simple and powerful as that. I’d also recommend being kind. The world could use more charm and kindness.

Recommended for readers who understand the difference between charm and manipulation. I’m not sure that includes me, but I’ve already read it so… sorry.

And thanks for reading!

A Field Guide to Lucid Dreaming: Mastering the Art of Oneironautics by Dylan Tuccillo

An excellent guide to experiencing or deepening lucid dreams, A Field Guide to Lucid Dreaming is filled with tips, tricks and advice to explore your dream world.

My husband and daughter experience lucid dreams all the time and I don’t or, at least, haven’t yet. It’s embarrassing.

It’s as if they have access to worlds that I can only dream about, literally. I picked this book up because I wanted to develop this skill too.

So far, with the advice contained within this Field Guide, I’ve realized that I was dreaming once, became lucid and immediately woke up. But, that’s progress.

I’m encouraged actually. If I can go lucid once, I can do it again.

“Lucid dreaming is the ability to know you’re dreaming while you’re dreaming. A lucid dreamer is able to go to sleep at night and wake up within his or her dream. With this unique awareness, you can generally behave like someone who is awake, exercising the free will, imagination, and memory of waking life.” introduction. How fun would that be?

Ever wanted to fly? Face your nightmares? Talk to a deceased loved one? The authors of this book claim that it is all possible.

They addressed some of my problems directly: “Quite often, the amateur lucid dreamer’s early exploits in lucidity last only a few moments. If you’ve become lucid already but lost your awareness very quickly, don’t worry. This is common. In the next chapter we’ll look at ways in which you can stabilize the dream and stay lucid for long stretches of time.” pg 106.

Practice makes perfect, it seems.

The shamanistic beliefs about the dream world are intriguing:“…shamans of indigenous cultures understood that in order for something to be created in the physical world (such as that kitchen you’ve been meaning to remodel, or this book), it must first be constructed in the “imaginal realm.” In other words, lucid dreaming might be a tool in creating our physical reality.”pg 151.

Life is like a dream and we are the dreamers, whether asleep or awake:“This world can be a nightmare or a nice dream. It’s full of friends or enemies, success or failure, meaning or nihilism. We’re headed toward destruction or we’re headed toward rebirth. There are many viewpoints on Earth as there are people. And just like the dream, we shape our experience with our thoughts, emotions, and expectations. pg 246.

Recommended for anyone who, like me, wants to master lucid dreaming. I think that this book will help you find your way.

Sweet dreams 🙂

Thanks for reading!

Art and Practice of Getting Material Things Through Creative Visualization by Ophiel

Originally published in 1967, the Art and Practice of Getting Material Things Through Creative Visualization arrived nearly three decades before The Secret.

With more of an occult than a New Age twist, the one-name author, Ophiel, talks readers through what is essentially the Law of Attraction, but he never calls it that.

Ophiel tends to write portions of the book that he thinks are most important in all caps. LIKE THIS. It can be annoying.

Another interesting quirk, Ophiel talks about him/herself in the third person, at all times.

In this passage, he’s talking about why he wrote this book, and you get to see the author’s style in action: “Ophiel’s defect consists of not being about to accept self-styled prophets’ sayings, and teachings, without raising the following awkward question- and making the following embarrassing test. The question is IS WHAT THEY SAY TRUE? and the test is DOES WHAT THEY SAY WORK, AND PRODUCE RESULTS? And if what they SAY DOES NOT WORK THEN IT IS NOT TRUE, and into the garbage can with it!!” pg iii

Ophiel claims that creative visualization techniques don’t always work for a variety of reasons. He gives the reader exercises and suggestions for improving their results.

“In Creative Visualization work all the planes involved in our cosmic existence are used, the Etheric, the Lower Astral, The Higher Astral, the Mental Plane, and the Causal Plane, AND ALL THESE PLANES HAVE DEFINITE RULES AND LAWS FROM WHICH THEY WILL NOT DEVIATE ONE IOTA.” pg 5.

Again, with the capitalization.

Photo by stein egil liland on Pexels.com

He also has interesting ideas about reasons why beginners fail out of the gate.

He cites something called “the sphere of availability”: “The new student then proceeds to visualize for LARGE THINGS. BIG THINGS. VALUABLE THINGS. Things that are far beyond his ability- not to visualize-imagine-desire, BUT FAR BEYOND HIS PRESENT ABILITY TO DEMONSTRATE-VISUALIZE.” pg 31.

Ophiel uses different words, but essentially he says, start small, celebrate the small victories and increase your “sphere of availability” in that manner. He also gives practices to improve your visualization skills.

Honestly, if asked to recommend a teacher for creative visualization, I’d say skip Ophiel and read Abraham Hicks. They’re a lot more fun.

Thanks for reading!

10% Happier: How I Tamed the Voice in My Head, Reduced Stress Without Losing My Edge, and Found Self-Help That Actually Works by Dan Harris

Dan Harris had problems, like all of us, but unlike all of us, he was beginning to experience some of the messier symptoms of his dysfunctional inner world in front of millions of people.

He sought help and jumped into the meditation world with both feet. I think its why most people find their way into spiritual practices- something isn’t working quite right in their life and they need to change from the inside out. So, they look for a process of inner change and run smack into meditation.

However, Dan isn’t drinking the kool-aid of the new age movement. He questions every practice for its practical benefits and searches for scientific experimentation to back up those benefits.

In essence, he brings the investigative skills that he applies to his job as a news anchor to the practice of meditation and it’s a delight to read.

I loved this. Dan had the same initial reaction to Eckhart Tolle and Deepak Chopra that I did. One of them seems too mellow to be real and the other seems to market himself too well to be that spiritual.

Over time, I’ve come to love both of those authors/gurus for their wisdom, but they are both just out of this world. Harris isn’t afraid to point that out.

In conclusion, I’d recommend 10% Happier to anyone who wants to become 10% happier- isn’t that all of us?

Also, anyone who has read Eckhart Tolle or Deepak Chopra may also enjoy this, if only for the surprisingly accurate descriptions of their foibles. Anyone who wants to try meditation but feels like they don’t have time, couldn’t do it if they tried, or doesn’t know where to start may find some inspiration from this book.

And, finally, anyone who is fed up with the hippie-dippie-trippie feeling that most spiritual memoirs give them, will find a kindred soul in Dan Harris.

Thanks for reading!

I’ll Put 3 Chips on God, Just in Case There is One by Preeti Gupta

I’ll Put 3 Chips on God, Just in Case There is One reads like what you would get if you crossed Bridget Jones’ Diary with an episode of Seinfeld and added a dash of New Age spiritual musings.

Preeti, in a conversational way, discusses topics ranging from karma to palm reading.

I liked that she didn’t talk down to the reader or apologize for her thoughts. She just puts it out there and lets everybody come to their own conclusions.

My favorite part of this book was when Preeti goes to the astrologist twice to see if he would give her the same natal chart on both visits. She lets some years pass so that she won’t be recognized by her face and compares the results. They don’t match.

Preeti celebrates the fact that the charts were completely different because it backs up her theory that folks who are in the spiritual business only for money are hucksters.

But, at the same time, she doesn’t dismiss astrology as utter nonsense and leaves the door open for more learning on the subject.

It’s refreshing to find an author who is that willing to entertain different traditions even in the face of a fraudulent experience. She freely admits that she doesn’t know the ultimate truth and I think everyone can resonate with that idea… because, who does, really? Not me.

If you enjoyed I’ll Put 3 Chips on God, I’d recommend reading Life’s Operating Manual: With the Fear and Truth Dialogues(Tom Shadyac’s thoughts on life and spirituality) or Tipping Sacred Cows: The Uplifting Story of Spilt Milk and Finding Your Own Spiritual Path in a Hectic World (in the same conversational type of style as this book and with irreverent humor, Betsy Chasse talks about her journey through the New Age Movement).

I received a free digital copy of this book from the author. Thank you, Preeti, for sending it to me.

And, thank you, for reading!

Art Of Possibility by Rosamund Stone Zander, Benjamin Zander

The Art of Possibility takes a psychologist and a musician and smooshes their ideologies together to create a self help program.

“Our premise is that many of the circumstances that seem to block us in our daily lives may only appear to do so based on a framework of assumptions we carry with us. Draw a different frame around the same set of circumstances and new pathways come into view.” pg 1.

The various practices that are discussed in The Art of Possibility seek to create those new frames.

One of my favorite chapters was: Being a Contribution. In it, the authors suggest playing life like a game. “The purpose of describing, say, your professional life or your family traditions as a game is twofold. You instantly shift the context from one of survival to one of opportunity for growth. You also have the choice of imagining other games you might prefer to play in these realms.” pg 59.

As a gamer, that’s an idea that I can easily assimilate into my life. 🙂

I also enjoyed: The Way Things Are. “Being present to the way things are is not the same as accepting things as they are … It simply means, being present without resistance: being present to what is happening and present to your reactions, no matter how intense.” pg 100.

A little bit of Buddhist philosophy can go a long way.

One of my complaints about this book is that I don’t think that it fit together as seamlessly as they were hoping it would.

Also, I feel like non-musicians may not get as much out of this book as I did. It is rather heavy on the music stories and metaphors.

But, like many self-help books, it is packed with actionable suggestions and feel-good stories. Recommended for those looking to inject a little more possibility into their lives.

Thanks for reading!

The Power of Personality: How Introverts and Extroverts Can Combine to Amazing Effect by Sylvia Loehken

The Power of Personality is more than just another book that picks apart the obvious differences between introverts, centroverts, and extroverts. It delves very deeply into the strengths and possible hurdles that each face in business, social situations, and with each other.

Loehken presents management techniques for the different personality types and how one might leverage innate characteristics for the most positive outcome possible in a variety of ways. I found the book to be very helpful in explaining my own reactions to most perceived conflicts.

I hope to utilize what I’ve learned in the future to harness my strengths while minimizing the others. Some of my more damaging introverted tendencies are that I’m conflict/contact adverse and easily overstimulated in every day life.

I thought when Loehken discusses how the different personality types view each other that her descriptions were spot on. I think I do tend to categorize most extroverts as loud, unthinking buffoons. My mistake.

I suppose that extroverts view me as “boring, lame duck, sensitive flower, unsociable, professional worrier, reader, timid”pg 51. I never considered why.

Perhaps now with a more educated mindset, I can embrace personality differences and work more smoothly with extroverts. Rather than, in my previous experience, pushing them away so that I can have some peace and quiet.

The other portion of the book that I enjoyed is Chapter 8: Stressful Encounters: Status Games pg 161. It reminded me of a book on body language, I Can Read You Like a Book: How to Spot the Messages and Emotions People Are Really Sending with Their Body Language. But, instead of just focusing on body language, Loehken goes into all manner of status symbols, interactions, and conversational cues.

She dissects how, particularly introverts, do themselves a disservice in their professional and personal lives because of how they perceive and react to conflict. It blew my mind.

It may be because this is a European book (the price on the back is listed in pounds) but I have never read anything like this in an American business book. Loehken talks about the unwritten rules of polite society and how, in sometimes subconscious ways, we shape our relationships and our status to the people around us.

One of her tips for dominating or owning space that I’m going to integrate into my life (right now!) is to sit fully on an office chair instead of perching on the edge. “If you take the whole seating area of a chair, this has a higher status effect than someone who only takes up half the seat or sits on the edge.”pg 175. Lesson learned.

The weak part of this book was any of the bits that dealt with centrovists. Basically, Loehken kept saying (paraphrasing in my own words) ‘If you’re a centrovist, you enjoy the benefits from both types of personalities and will therefore be more successful in whatever it is that we’re talking about in this section.’

It got kind of annoying after awhile because Loehken tells us that everyone exists on a scale of personality (we’re rarely entirely one type or another from situation to situation) so the centrovist advice could have been most applicable for every reader. Unfortunately, it felt more like a ‘Captain Obvious’ moment every time it came up rather than a revelation.

If you enjoyed The Power of Personality, I’d suggest reading I Can Read You Like a Book: How to Spot the Messages and Emotions People Are Really Sending with Their Body Language. It deals with body language rather than the driving personality behind the body, but it is still illuminating. It helps readers monitor the involuntary signals that we send out in our day to day interactions, how to leverage your movements and to send the message that you want to send, rather than broadcasting your internal mindset unintentionally.

I received a free copy of this book through Goodreads First Reads. FTC guidelines: check! Thanks for reading!

Time in a Bottle: Mastering the Experience of Life by Howard Falco

Time in a Bottle is a self help book about changing your perceptions to improve your life. Though not a new message, some readers may find this book worth the time.

Howard Falco presents this knowledge with a spiritual slant. Readers who are turned off by that kind of thing may want to choose another book.

The main premise: “Our misunderstanding of time- how our thoughts relate to time, how time is actually created, and how time seems limited- is one of the biggest reasons we suffer and at times feel hopeless or powerless in our lives.” pg 1, introduction.

One of the ways to “master the experience of life” is to realize that you are infinite potential like the universe itself: “You are a part of infinity. To the degree that you feel that life is finite and limited, you will act out of this fear, and work to create an experience that is a result of this fear.” pg 33.

I agree that mindset is important to determining your life’s path. Love and fear seem to be the two driving forces of our world. Wonder why that is…

Falco also discusses giving up resistance to how life is: “It is critical that you know that the ending of your resistance toward any particular thing (sickness, layoffs, war, family, financial trouble, death, political chaos, natural disasters, etc.) is not in anyway condoning these terrible things or giving up on change. It is simply the full acknowledgment that for the moment this is what is happening.” pg 40

He talks about giving up regrets about the past that could potentially be holding you back: “This is not about accepting that something had to happen to you; it is about acknowledging that it did happen and standing in front of the universe saying, “I trust that there is perfection and a specific, divine purpose for my past and the exact way it unfolded. Because of this, I am realizing more of my unlimited potential for the future.”

So then, unburdened, you step into your future with faith.

Falco incorporates quotes from famous philosophers and scientists along with anecdotal stories to illustrate his points. As I said, no new wisdom here, but plenty of good reminders to trust, forgive and move forward to a life outside of time.

Thanks for reading!

The Help Desk Book Blog

Sharing reviews and deep thoughts about life.

Tag: Self Help

Level Up Your Life: How to Unlock Adventure and Happiness by Becoming the Hero of Your Own Story by Steve Kamb

The Power of Charm: How to Win Anyone Over in Any Situation by Brian Tracy and Ron Arden

A Field Guide to Lucid Dreaming: Mastering the Art of Oneironautics by Dylan Tuccillo

Art and Practice of Getting Material Things Through Creative Visualization by Ophiel

10% Happier: How I Tamed the Voice in My Head, Reduced Stress Without Losing My Edge, and Found Self-Help That Actually Works by Dan Harris

I’ll Put 3 Chips on God, Just in Case There is One by Preeti Gupta

Art Of Possibility by Rosamund Stone Zander, Benjamin Zander

The Power of Personality: How Introverts and Extroverts Can Combine to Amazing Effect by Sylvia Loehken

Time in a Bottle: Mastering the Experience of Life by Howard Falco

Menu

Sharing reviews and deep thoughts about life.

Share this Blog:

Share this Blog:

Share this Blog:

Share this Blog:

Share this Blog:

Share this Blog:

Share this Blog:

Share this Blog:

Share this Blog:

Menu