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JOMO: Celebrate the Joy of Missing Out! by Jessica Misener

JOMO: Celebrate the Joy of Missing Out! by Jessica Misener

JOMO or “the joy of missing out” lists “350 plus ways to make staying in more fun than going out.” Unfortunately, a large number of these suggestions included books to read or programs to watch. In my mind, all of those fit into one of two categories, reading or watching television.

“Because skipping a night on the town doesn’t mean you’re missing out on life – you’re just missing out on someone else’s idea of what your life should look like.” pg 7

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That being said, there were a few solid suggestions in this book for alleviating boredom. I particularly liked “shower with the lights off” pg 24, “listen to autonomous sensory meridian response videos” pg 47, and “do The New York Times’s 36 questions” pg 127.

The rest of these seemed repetitive, as I mentioned, or uninteresting.

Perhaps this book would have been more enjoyable in the pre-COVID world, when I hadn’t been quarantining at home for months, disappointed with the state of the world and feeling stymied. Maybe I could have gotten into “make a homemade pizza” or “rearrange your furniture.” But things have moved beyond expecting the completion of simplistic tasks to hold the answers to life’s problems, at least for me.

“Host a fondue party,” that appears on the cover of this book, seems like something that happened in another world. Will we ever get back there?

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Thanks for reading!

Dear Girls Above Me: Inspired by a True Story by Charlie McDowell

Dear Girls Above Me: Inspired by a True Story by Charlie McDowell

Dear Girls Above Me is about Charlie McDowell’s time living beneath a loud group of gossiping young women (names have been changed to protect the innocent). He claims to have learned much about love, life and himself through his eavesdropping.

From the description, I thought this book was going to be cute. Instead, I found it very creepy.

“I most definitely did not expect to be the unwilling audience of a twenty-four-hour slumber party between the Winston Churchill and Benjamin Franklin of the 90210 generation.” pg 6, ebook.

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But, shortly after professing his irritation for the girls, he spends an inordinate amount of time wandering around his apartment, looking for the location with the best “reception” of their voices.

“…I’m living underneath a couple of Kardashian wannabes who spend their time gossiping, starving themselves, and throwing noisy parties.” pg 21, ebook.

Instead of ignoring them or moving to a new apartment, Charlie creates a Twitter account where he mercilessly mocks the snippets of conversation he overhears. It seemed very passive-aggressive to me.

“As my Dear Girls Above Me Twitter following grew, so did my guilt and anxiety. Each day, more and more people were discovering my ‘letters’ to the girls, and I felt as if it was only a matter of time before they stumbled across it.” pg 113, ebook.

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But not guilty enough to stop tweeting about it.

Charlie does try to build reader sympathy by sharing some fairly embarrassing stories about his own personal life, but it didn’t really work. I found myself feeling embarrassed for everyone in this book rather than amused.

The low point of this tale was this: Dear Girls Above Me, ‘The psychic said I have a serious stalker in my life!’ I much prefer ‘a friend who always listens,’ thank you very much. pg 194, ebook.

No, stalker is more appropriate. Sorry.

I don’t recommend this book.

Thanks for reading!

Living Oprah: My One-Year Experiment to Live as TV’s Most Influential Guru Advises by Robyn Okrant

Living Oprah: My One-Year Experiment to Live as TV’s Most Influential Guru Advises by Robyn Okrant
livingoprah

Living Oprah is Robyn Okrant’s account of how she spent one year conscientiously following the advice Oprah dishes out to millions of women across America.

If Oprah said to read a book or watch a film, Robyn did it. If she advised de-cluttering, new make-up tips or relationship work, Robyn was on-board.

For the most part, I enjoyed this quirky book, but I also found it to be slightly repetitive- similar to what Robyn found following Oprah to be after a few months.

She starts out with high hopes: “Could Oprah’s guidance truly lead a woman to her ‘best life,’ or would it fail miserable? Is it even possible to follow someone else’s advice to discover one’s authentic self?” pg 4.

We all discover the answer to be no. But, Robyn gives it a good run because: “It’s vitally important for women to question the sources of influence and persuasion in our lives. We are inundated with get rich/get thin/get married suggestions every time we turn on the TV or walk by the magazine rack. And sadly, we tend to judge ourselves against seemingly impossible standards.” pg 11.

I liked her thought process throughout the year. I also thought her reasoning for doing the experiment was excellent: “One of the reasons I was drawn to Oprah as a subject for this project was my continual search for new ways to manage my pain, keep my self-esteem from faltering, and ease the stress and fear associated with scoliosis.” pg 36. In some ways, Robyn was sort of Oprah’s target audience.

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My favorite part of this book was when Robyn was trying to follow Oprah’s advice to read Eckert Tolle’s A New Earth and live by its precepts, while still engaging in the consumerism and self improvement programs Oprah touts on her program each week.

“It’s also uncomfortable to enjoy a celebrity lovefest on Oprah after I’ve spent an hour competing my reading assignment for A New Earth. Oprah’s Book Club selection focuses on separating ourselves from our ego and learning to connect with people on an authentic level rather than a superficial one. I don’t see how a segment on the show glamorizing Mariah Carey’s lingerie closet supports the work Oprah’s asked us to do.” pg 72.

Robyn comes to the conclusion that if Oprah’s viewers followed all of Oprah’s advice, they quickly wouldn’t need her anymore to live their best lives. Part of Oprah’s draw is that she has viewers convinced there’s always something more to be improved upon, tweaked, de-cluttered or examined.

It is a never-ending process of evolution. That is why Oprah’s built her empire and also why women don’t stop watching.

And sometimes it’s the promise of ‘infotainment’ that keeps viewers coming back: “Oprah frequently reminds her guests and audience that her tell-all shows are not pulp entertainment, they are for our education. I do take her warning to heart but think that if this is something we must constantly be reminded about, maybe a different format is in order.” pg 57-58

I’ve never been a huge watcher of Oprah (or any tv for that matter), but I still enjoyed this book for it’s honest examination of hero worship, popular culture and the self improvement industry. I think Oprah viewers may enjoy this book even more.

Thanks for reading!

The Mommy Shorts Guide to Remarkably Average Parenting by Ilana Wiles

The Mommy Shorts Guide to Remarkably Average Parenting by Ilana Wiles
remarkably average

The Mommy Shorts Guide to Remarkably Average Parenting is one of the best books about parenthood I’ve ever read. It is an honesty, funny and poignant look at the un-glamorous side of parenting. I loved the pictures. I loved the stories. I wish that this book had been around when I had my baby. Between this read and How Not to Hate Your Husband After Kids, mothers-to-be have all their bases covered.

Ilana warns mothers about the perils of choosing rare names: “… if you want to name your child something odd, I support you. I like odd names. I think odd names make the world a more interesting place. But you should be prepared to hear some criticism when you are at your most vulnerable.” pg 19. I didn’t even pick something that weird for my child (Willow) but I still faced criticism. When I told my grandpa the name I picked for his first female great-grandkid, he told me that it was the stupidest thing he’d ever heard. And there I was, heavily pregnant. Yeah, I cried. Wish someone had warned me.

I empathized with the idea that parents have no clue what they’re doing and we’re all secretly terrified that we’re going to screw up our kids in some irreparable way. Over a decade later and I still feel that: “In hindsight, the newborn phase wouldn’t be that hard if new parents weren’t so worried about messing up in such a way that it would ruin their newborn’s life forever.” pg 33.

The page entitled, My two-year-old’s rules for eating a banana pg 76, had me in stitches. Kids are so weird about food. My daughter is currently on a mac-n-cheese, ramen and ice cream kick. This time last year, all she would eat was homemade pancakes and grilled cheese with the crusts cut off. I’m sure that in another year, we’ll be somewhere else. And it’s not just about the “what”, there’s also the “how.” If you cut the crusts off the grilled cheese, but then don’t cut it diagonally, then no dice. You may as well throw it out because my kid won’t eat it. It’s absurd, but true. Poor Ilana suffers through the same thing but with bananas.

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The other funniest mini-chapter is: “Totally Butchered Words: Even if you do stop cursing and shield your kids’ ears from swearwords outside the home, your kids will probably still end up saying a few unfortunate things anyway. This is because toddlers might be trying to say one thing, but then it comes out sounding like another word entirely.” pg 116. I can’t even quote what she prints on the next pages because it is too filthy but, in my opinion, it is absolutely hilarious.

Ilana’s parenting philosophy is fantastic: “It’s not a matter of high or low expectations- it’s a matter of no expectations. Discover who your kid is as you go. Your kids will not be who you expect, but the things that amaze us most in life are never the things we expect.” pg 215 Mine amazes me all the time.

Highly recommended to own or give as a gift, The Mommy Shorts Guide to Remarkably Average Parenting is a cut-above average.

Thanks for reading!