The Opposite of Loneliness is an excellent collection of fiction and non-fiction essays by Marina Keegan, a Yale student who died in a car wreck a couple days after she graduated from college.
My favorite essay out of the bunch is “Against the Grain” pg 157 where she discusses her Celiac disease and the negative effect that that had on her mother.
She expresses frustration with how ridiculously protective her mother became when they were finally able to figure out what was wrong. She talks about being embarrassed at holidays as her mom cooked separate pies just for her or at field trips when her mother brought along special snacks.
But then, she reveals how she saw an internet article about how having Celiac disease could negatively effect the fetus when the sufferer becomes pregnant… and it’s a light bulb moment for Marina. She suddenly understands that feeling, how she would do anything to protect that other person, her baby, and suddenly her mom’s behavior doesn’t seem all that crazy after all.
Of course, the absolutely heartbreaking moment for the reader is realizing that this particular dream will never come to fruition for Marina, but the fact that she even had that “ah-ha” moment is so powerful.
Marina’s writing highlights the sometimes indescribable feelings of daily life in such a powerful way.
For example: “My dog let out a small howl, twigs cracked in the woods, and something about the stillness or my state of mind reminded me of the world’s remarkable capacity to carry on in every place at once.”pg 34 I always had that feeling towards the end of the semester during college.
You’d work at this frantic pace, not giving a thought about your family or friends at home, then somehow in the lull between the final and actually going home, it would occur to me to wonder how my sisters had been for the last ten weeks or what my high school buddies had been up to.
I’d also forgotten that the world “carr(ies) on in every place at once.” Loved that sentiment.
“I worry sometimes that humans are afraid of helping humans.”pg 153 I worry about that too.
In that essay, Marina is talking about helping to save whales that were beached near her home. She talks about the time, effort, and money that is spent without consideration for the fact that only so many of the whales will actually be saved.
Then, when these whale rescuers go home, they do so without a backward glance towards the homeless on the streets, who are just as “beached” as the whales that they’ve been caring for all day.
“You feel like so many people are doing it and talking about it all the time like it’s interesting, so you start to wonder if maybe it really is.” pg 190.
Marine was writing about how 25 percent of Yale graduates go immediately into banking or consulting positions that have absolutely nothing to do with their long term goals, but provide a quick paycheck in the short term.
Will they ever realize their dreams? If they make enough money, will they even care?
Life is about more than a paycheck. Marine Keegan knew that and her life had barely begun.
If you enjoyed The Opposite of Loneliness, I’d suggest Cool, Calm & Contentious, an excellent and serious collection of essays about life, or Zombie Spaceship Wasteland, a comedic collection of essays about life that are surprisingly insightful.
Thanks for reading!
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